Monday, July 24, 2006

Lost

For the next couple of weeks I am going to be housesitting for my parents. They have only lived in this house for a few months. I had the choice of sleeping in the guest room or their room. I choose their room because the guest room only has a full size bed which is far too small for my nearly 6’5” body. They have a king, so it fits just right.

I had packed a bag with everything I would need for the next two weeks clothes, shoes, toiletries, lube. Later when I was at work I realized I left the lube out on the nightstand when I was unpacking. I felt a little strange, but no one would be there to see and there was nothing I could do about it at that moment.

When I got I put the lube back into my bag just to ease my mind. Elbert called me to say he would meet me at the T station in 20 minuets. I grabbed my wallet, but I couldn’t find me car keys. I loose my keys at least once a week, but I am used to living in a three-room apartment, the places they could be are limited. In their house there was much more ground to cover and recover. I retraced my steps through the garage into the family room, up the stairs to the kitchen where I emptied my pockets, into the bathroom, then the bedroom. No keys. Back to the family room under the sofa, then the kitchen, checked the office even though I wasn’t in there, back to the bedroom. I was stumped. Maybe they fell under the bed and couldn’t see them, because the hideous dust ruffle my mother has. I stuck my head under the bed. The keys weren’t there, however the bottle of lubed had some how fallen under bed. I reached for the bottle. KY warming liquid? This isn’t mine!

8 Comments:

At 5:16 PM, Blogger EGL said...

EEEEEEeeeeewwwwww. Thanks for that.

 
At 10:38 PM, Blogger Hanuman1960 said...

Egl beat me to it, but, it bears repeating.

Eeeeeeeeeeew!!!!

Old people sex! :(

 
At 3:40 PM, Blogger Bill German said...

if that bed could talk? (6'5", Is it true what they say?)

 
At 5:02 PM, Blogger Scotty said...

Well now isn't that interesting. Ummmm, I found my mom's vibrater when iw as a teenage...talk about image shattering!

 
At 6:18 PM, Blogger David said...

I found my parents' copy of The Joy of Sex.

 
At 11:52 AM, Blogger The Persian said...

yikes....

 
At 11:21 AM, Blogger Six Shooter said...

To reiterate ...

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!


Now make sure to leave it out, with a note, saying, "in case you lost this, it had dropped under the bed."

 
At 2:57 AM, Blogger Debbye said...

Items I've found in my parent's room over the years:

A)Cheesy Seventies Porn.
B)Playboy and Hustler Magazines (as well as a scary European porn magazines)
C)The Joy of Sex
D)(the infamous) KY Warming Gel
E)Viagra
F)Almost every form of Birth Control you can imagine

I know, I should work for the CIA...

 

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